We're going to a 'land' He showed us!

Abraham set out to the land that God would show him. He was told to go, not knowing where he was going, and he went. 

That has been such a cool story for Drew and I lately. God calls us to different things throughout life. Some good things and some hard things - but all things to make us become more like Him. Our goal as the Hunsley family is to make much of Him. To love God and share that with others - no matter whether it is easy or difficult. We pray we will be faithful each day with how we should live that out - even when we don't understand it. 

That being said, God told us to go to a land He would show us... and we were willing. We thought for sure it would be far away. Arizona, Massachusetts, Georgia, Florida, Michigan. Instead God has placed us, through circumstances only He could orchestrate, back home in Roanoke. Drew has accepted a position as Associate Pastor of Family Ministries at Green Ridge Baptist Church. 

It has been a whirlwind of a couple weeks. 

It has been hard. Hard knowing we are leaving so many people we love. We've seen our kids grow to love God on a deeper level. We've seen people help and care for us when we were in need. They love our kids well and we will miss them a lot. 

It has also been so good. It's been good because we have seen God work in so many of the details. He is in this decision and we are reminded of that daily. It is also good because the GRBC family has already been wonderful. We've had people praying for us both in the process of gaining one job, and having to leave the other. 

We are excited to follow Him back home and see what God has next for us! 

My Calling

"I therefore, a prisoner for the Lord, urge you to walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace. " (Ephesians 4:1-3)

I believe that I have 3 main callings in life right now.

Number one is to be a godly wife to my husband. Drew is a man who works hard in his 'job' to not only provide for us, but to reach the teens in Mount Airy. My calling is to support him, love him, and help him however I can.

Number two is to a mama that my Peyton (and soon to be Sadie) will see Jesus through. They are small children and I must protect and guide them to see Jesus' love as all they need in life. They will be around all sorts of people in life. I want them to know that not only are they (Peyton and Sadie) loved, but those around them are just as loved by our Jesus.

Number three is a youth leader. I have the privilege of spending time with amazing middle and high-schoolers and hopefully helping them to understand Jesus and how amazing He is, a little better.

My question to myself today is am I walking worthy of these callings? Am I striving to be humble, gentle, loving and patient with Drew, Peyton, Sadie, and the teens, so that they don't see me, but instead see our Savior. Honestly many days I am not. I'm impatient and short, and selfish, but am thankfully today is a new day and Jesus has wiped my slate clean!

Jesus Calling

I wanted to quote today's Jesus Calling, but the whole things was way too good and what I needed so I'm typing the whole thing out. Today has been a good day, but I am challenged that I need to praise God through good and bad days... when I'm surrounded by loved ones and when I am completely alone.

It is impossible to praise or thank me to much. As it is written, I inhabit the praises of My people. Sometimes your adoration is a spontaneous overflow of Joy, in the response to radiant beauty or rich blessings. At other times your praise is more disciplined and measured  - an act of your will. I dwell equally in both types of praise. Thankfulness, also, is a royal road to draw near Me. A thankful heart has plenty of room for Me. 
When you thank Me for the many pleasures I provide, you affirm that I am God from whom all blessings flow. When adversity strikes and you thank Me anyway, your trust in My sovereignty is a show piece in invisible realms. Fill up the spare moments of your life with praise and thanksgiving. This joyous discipline will help you live in the intimacy of My Presence.


Psalm 22:3 / Psalm 146:1-2 / Thessalonians 5:18

We stand forgiven at the cross

This is the other song I was talking about being challenging to me. So glad to get a good reminder of His amazing, sacrificial love for us! Again, I challenge you to read the words slowly. Look them up on YouTube and listen to the song. God can use songwriters in wonderful ways!

And oh to see the dawn of the darkest day Christ on the road to Calvary Tried by sinful men, torn and beaten Then nailed to a cross of wood

This the power of the cross Christ became sin for us Took the blame, bore the wrath We stand forgiven at the cross

And oh to see the pain written on Your face Bearing the awesome weight of sin And every bitter thought, every evil deed Crowning Your bloodstained brow

This the power of the cross Christ became sin for us Took the blame, bore the wrath We stand forgiven at the cross

And oh to see my name written in the wounds For through Your suffering I am free And death is crushed to death and life is mine to live Won through Your selfless love

This the power of the cross Son of God slain for us What a life, what a cost We stand forgiven at the cross

 

What humility God has to live a perfect life, and then be tried AND CONVICTED of a crime by sinful men! God took the blame, He knows the failings of each one of us and took all of those - big and small- and put them on himself to pay. We are guilty - but Christ took that guilt. He was self-less, and I live as a result. 

I am ashamed to say I do not live every day as though I was saved at such a high cost! I should be daily humbling myself and admitting I am nothing without Him, and often I fail to do that. I pray that these songs are a powerful reminder of Who Christ is and that I stop taking that for granted!

He had no tears for His own griefs...

Scotty- our pastor - started a series in Romans which is all about Salvation and the freedom of that gift God gave. Trevor - our worship pastor - does an amazing job of matching the songs we sing with the following message. Two really stuck out in my mind from last Sunday that I wanted to share. I told Drew that Scotty didn't even need to preach that week, I was convicted enough just singing the songs!! Here is the first one, you all probably know it. Read it slowly.

 

I stand amazed in the presence
Of Jesus the Nazarene
And I wonder how He could love me,
A sinner condemned, unclean.

Chorus:
How marvelous, how wonderful
And my song shall ever be.
How marvelous, how wonderful
Is my Savior's love for me.

For me it was in the garden He prayed,
"Not my will, but thine"
He had no tears for His own griefs,
But sweat drops of blood for mine.

Chorus

He took my sins and my sorrows,
He made them His very own;
He bore the burden to Calv'ry,
And suffered and died alone.

Chorus

When with the ransomed in glory
His face I at last shall see,
'Twill be my joy thro' the ages,
To sing of His love for me.

Ransomed – the ones that had the price paid for them… 

Jesus paid that price. He was so selfless that didn’t cry for the situation that He was in, but rather sweat drops of blood for my sin. I was who he thought of up on that cross, not Himself. He was alone, and suffered miserably. He took my selfishness. My lust. My greed. My thanklessness. My worry. My stress. My lack of Joy. He took all of that upon Himself and made it his identity. I now am able to rejoice that Christ did that selfless act - and spend eternity praising and thanking Him for it.

Wow.

Make Him Known

 To God's elect... strangers in the world, scattered throughout...

Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! In his great mercy he has given us new birth into a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, and into an inheritance that can NEVER perish, spoil or fade-kept in heaven for you...

1 Peter 1:1,3,4

I feel like I have been going through the past couple  years with the wrong mindset. Drew and I? We're missionaries. We are chosen to do Christ's work even though we are at 'home'. We may be happy and content or dissatisfied and rejected - but as long as we are in God's will, we should be joyful. It should not be about us being comfortable. Just because we are in our hometown doesn't mean life should be easy. God has called me to be set apart - different. I'm called to do what He commands no matter how difficult or lonely that might be. 

Some questions I have been asking myself lately are how can I better prepare my heart for this 'long term missions trip.' Any of you who have been on a missions trip knows it takes time and prayer in order to be spiritually and physically ready to go somewhere. I've been to Thailand and the Dominican Republic twice and have loved every aspect of those journeys. BUT I HAVE  A MISSION EVERY DAY! 

So what are the needs around me? What can I do as a stay at home mom/nanny/student in order to make God known?? What needs do Oakland Baptist Church have? How can I be a light to them? How can I daily pray and prepare myself for this trip that never ends??

The verse above has a great perspective on what our lives should be about. We should be giving praise to God for the fact our hope in Christ is constant. Nothing can change the fact that He loves me, He died for me, and He is alive. That's not something I can ignore or keep quiet about!

A blog I read the other day said that we can be afraid even while we rejoice. It was talking about when Mary found Jesus' tomb empty and there was an angel standing there. She was frightened, and yet joyful over what had happened. 

Life is tough. We all have difficult things come up in our lives. My prayer is that even when I am afraid of the unknown, or even known things that are difficult, I will rejoice. I will rejoice in the fact God truly does 'have the whole world in His hands.' Nothing that happens is a shock to Him. I can carry on with my missions work while He works out the details. 

I'm choosing to praise God for that!

Humility

What a difficult word to grasp. God has been bringing it up over and over in my life lately. It's hard to focus solely on giving God glory, and looking past being hurt. I watched a Matt Chandler video about our lives not being about us. Everything in my life should be about bringing God glory. period. If I am hurt or neglected, it doesn't matter, because my life should be about him. This world WILL disappoint. The only thing we know for sure is that Christ will never leave us. He knows our weaknesses. He knows our disappointments and insecurities and every sin that we face. He loves us in spite of those things and he wants us to glorify Him even when we are going through them. He also wants us to glorify Him when things are going wonderfully, thanking Him for every tiny detail of our day. Some people find it easier to love God when things go our way. They have a 'if you make MY life good, than I will praise you' mentality. Others find it easier to cling to God when things are difficult. They lean towards a 'if you hold me tightly while I got through ______ & comfort me, then I will love you'.

Think about it, we all fall into at least one category, if not both at one point or another. I know I do. Where in the world do we get this idea that anything is about us?? We are wretched sinners, saved solely by the fact our God loves us unconditionally... something I will never be able to fully grasp. It's frustrating to know I do anything BUT glorify Him through every part of my life. But I don't.

I'm reading Ruthless Trust right now, and Brennan Manning spends a great chapter on this word, 'Humility.' Below are some quotes that I definitely need to spend this week chewing on!

"Humble men and women do not have a low opinion of themselves; they have no opinion of themselves, because they so rarely think about themselves. The heart of humility lies in undivided attention to God..."

"No longer concerned with appearing to be good, we can move freely in the mystery of who we really are, aware of the sovereignty of God and of our absolute insufficiency and yet moved by a spirit of radical self-acceptance without self-concern."

"Humble people are small in their own eyes, honest about their struggles, and open to constructive criticism... They trust that they are loved, accepted, forgiven, and redeemed just as they are."

In utter self-forgetfulness, Jesus lived for God. The central theme in his personal life was the growing intimacy with, trust in, and love of his Abba. He lived securely in his Father's acceptance."

"The humble woman is grateful for her successes but not disheartened by her failures. She enjoys her gifts and readily admits her mistakes."

I pray I may find joy and delight simply and solely in pleasing Jesus.

God's Perfect Time

Since finding out on Thursday that my induction would be this Wednesday, I have had a vast variety of different emotions wash over me. While I feel extremely prepared, [well as prepared as one can be having her first child] the unknown is also scary. There are just some things in life, that no matter how many classes you take or advice you get, you can't fully know what to expect until you yourself experience it. I definitely feel like this is one of those things. My nerves are here, probably to stay. I had a sleepless night on Friday but thankfully Saturday and Sunday nights I slept great! Drew keeps reminding me

"do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God." (Phil. 4:6)

I love that simply stopping right when he says that, and praying, makes all the difference in the world.

What am I wondering/worrying/contemplating these days? I think any mother knows the answer to that. How labor will go. Will my baby be okay. You know, the basics. ;) I think the biggest thing for me though, is the thought of  our family moving from two to three.

 "Never be afraid to trust an unknown future to a known God" - Corrie Ten Boom

Don't get me wrong, I have prayed and am SO thrilled to be having Peyton. I truly believe God has called me to be a mom and I am so looking forward to my time cherishing this precious boy.

That being said, those of you that know me know that I am extremely in love with my husband. I am jealous of my time with him. We have been best friends/together for 8 years. (Well, February 1st it will be 8 years.) He is an amazing husband and I know he is going to make an amazing dad. There is just a little anxiety in my heart that I have to share him. ;) Adjustments. Unknowns. It's unfamiliar territory and I'm simply proceeding with caution. Praying that God will give me twice the love I have for Drew now so I can share it, because lets get real, I'm not going to start loving Drew less. ;)

I am in awe of the miracles that have come in my life. The fact I do love my husband, to some, is a miracle. The fact I am about to have a baby, is a miracle. The fact God has entrusted me with both... to love unconditionally, take care of selflessly, and pray for continually, is a miracle. I'm humbled and overwhelmed at the task before me. I'm also giddy and have butterflies with how wonderfully my life is about to change.

This is what I know:

I am about to have a baby boy that will need everything from me. Love, care, shelter, food, and knowledge of Jesus.

I have a husband that has been great throughout this pregnancy. Helpful, supportive, sacrificial, and super excited about loving this baby.

I have a God who knows every detail of my life - past and present. He knows what lies ahead this week, He knows that I can handle it because He does not give us things we cannot handle. My God has conquered the grave, and will give me the power to do everything I need to do... and when I don't feel like I can do something... maybe, just maybe, I don't need to do it. I.E. - having a spotless house, pleasing everyone, ultimately being 'super mom'.

I have an amazing support system that loves me, Drew and Peyton already. Their thoughts, prayers, and help - even before Peyton's birth day - have been the encouragement and strength that I have needed, and will need in the future! 

So yes, while I know there are many adjustments ahead. While I know that the unknown is scary. Thankfully I don't have to worry or be anxious. Because my God already knows. and HE knows I'm ready.

"This new season looms and I don't know what is next. But He doesn't need me to be ready for this season because HE. IS. READY. He just needs me to be clinging to His feet. Now. Is God's perfect time." - Katie Davis 

(Wednesday's blog-post from this girl was just what I needed. You should head over to The Journey and read it for yourself if you are finding yourself in a new season of life!)

Confession

The plumber came. We are still getting quotes but it looks pretty stinkin' grim. My initial reaction when Drew told me the news over the phone at Chuck E Cheese was tears. (Of course, what did you expect from a 32 week pregnant lady! For those of you who forgot, it was almost a year ago exactly that it was raining from our kitchen ceiling due to a bust pipe.)

I wanted to go to a corner and just pray. but I was with two kiddos in Chuck E Cheese.

My next reaction was fix-it mode. How can Drew and I lower our Christmas budget, should we ask for the remainder of our baby needs for Christmas presents so we don't have to purchase them? Should we stay home this weekend instead of going on our much needed over-night getaway this Saturday night... After all, we hear it's really good to get away for a few days before a baby comes, but is that wisest right now?

My mind has been wondering all evening how this delightful rather high bill is for our good. I know it is because my Jesus says it is, but sometimes reasoning is hidden for a time. I'm not a fan of that.

I  got out my journal, bible, and 'Jesus Calling' book at home. I think I have mentioned it before, but it's a pretty good book of reminders! Today's excerpt was the following:

Problems are part of life. They are inescapable: woven into the very fabric of this fallen world. You tend to go into problem-solving mode all too readily, acting as if you have the capacity to fix everything. This is a habitual response, so automatic that it bypasses your conscious thinking. Not only does this habit frustrate you, it also distances you from ME. 

 Do not let fixing things be your top priority. You are ever so limited in your capacity to correct all that is wrong in the world around you. Don't weigh yourself down with responsibilities that are not your own. Instead, make your relationship with Me your primary concern. Talk with Me about whatever is on your mind, seeking MY perspective on the situation. Rather than trying to fix everything that comes to your attention, ask Me to show you what is truly important. Remember that you are en route to heaven, and let your problems fade in the light of eternity.

Psalm 32:8 - I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go: I will guide you with My eye.

Luke 10:41&42 - And Jesus answered and said to her, "Martha,, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things, But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her."

Philippians 3:20&21 - For our citizenship is in heaven, from which we also eagerly wait for the Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ. who will transform our lowly body that it may be conformed to His glorious body, according to the working by which He is able even to subdue all things to Himself.

Wow. Way to slap me back into perspective. It's true though. I freak out about money and want to find ways to fix it... I think in that way I often limit my Jesus from showing up and doing something great, even if that is simply teaching me a life lesson.

I KNOW my Jesus is good. I KNOW He will supply all of my needs. I KNOW it will be in His perfect timing. Because He says so. In the mean time, I wait, & stay connected to what He is telling me to do, not what I think I need to do.

I know He's here.

 I think most people who know God have their special moment. You know, that one moment that happens randomly you can just really feel God?? I really don't think I'm crazy. When some people see a sunset, they KNOW that God gave that as a reminder to them personally that HE. IS. THERE. with them. Others see it in the rain, a rainbow, first flowers of spring, the ocean, bugs, waterfalls, etc... 

My "Moment" is when I drive or walk through a street/path that is lined with trees and the sun is shining through. When the shade is cool but random sun spots peak through. It's best in the fall, because the leaves changing add to the perfect picture. Any time I'm in that scene I feel my Jesus. It's like He give me a hug and says "I'm spending this day with you. I want you to enjoy and wonder in my creation." It's a feeling difficult to describe, but I LOVE it! :) Capturing it on camera is difficult, but I tried to snap a few this morning.

"I Know You're There"

If all I had was one last breath
I'd spend it just to sing Your praise
Just to say Your name
If all I had was one last prayer
I'd pray it 'cause I know You're always listening
If I could live a thousand lives, bind the hands of time
I would spend every moment by Your side

'cause I, I know You're there, I know You see me
You're the air I breathe
You are the ground beneath me
I know You're there, I know You hear me
I can find You anywhere

If all I had was one more song to sing
I would raise a noise to make the heavens 

If all I had was one last chance, I'd take it

 I would stake it all on You

If I could raise up high and catch a glimpse of every eye
I would make them believe
What I feel inside

If I could live a thousand lives and bind the hands of time
If I could rise up high and catch a glimpse of every eye

I know You're there

Does it HAVE to be one or the other??

them, "Do you want a girl or a boy?"

me, "I'm okay with either"

them, "But if you HAD to pick...?"

That's just it. I don't have to pick whether I want a boy or a girl to be living inside of me. The decision has already been made. Way back in May our God decided that the best possible thing for Drew and I would be to put us on this journey called pregnancy. This baby is His and I am just the vessel He is blessing with by allowing me to be mom, no matter how long or short that may be.

As you can probably tell, God and I had a chat this morning. I've been asked too many times to count, what I would prefer my baby to be. I kept my answers vague because I don't want to be the least bit disappointed if my expectations are different than reality. I'm having a baby. I get to be a mom, which is all I really want to be in life anyway. I know that is a huge calling, and I know that I will only receive what God thinks is best for my life!

"For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother's womb. I praise you for I am fearfully and wonderfully made."

"My frame was not hidden from you, when I was being made in secret, intricately woven... Your eyes saw my unformed substance; in your book were written, every one of them, the days that were formed for me, when as yet there were none of them."

Psalm 139:13-16

Therefore, what I want doesn't really matter. My baby has either been a he, or a she, since May. God knows exactly what Drew and I need in order to make our family after His will. I'm just grateful I'm apart of it! I almost feel like I am doing my baby a disservice by choosing a preference, after all, while I'm deciding on whether I want a girl or a boy, I already have one or the other in my belly.

When asked the beginning question, I have been saying, "Girl, because they are more fun to dress up." That's my reasoning, but in reality, whether I put pigtails in my baby girl's hair or allow my baby boy to run around barefoot with overalls and no shirt, I will be thanking God that I have the privilege to be a mommy. Drew and I have been praying since we got married that we would one day have kids and that they would grow up to love the Lord. That's all the preference I have!

"For this child I prayed, and the Lord has granted me my petition that I made to him. Therefore I have lent him to the Lord. As long as he lives, he is lent to the Lord."

1Samuel 1:27,28

Baby Hunsley is God's. He or she is made so that God's glory can be revealed. So whether I have this baby for a day or 100 years, I thank Him for this journey.

That being said, tomorrow is the BIG REVEAL and Drew and I are ecstatic to be able to 1] see our baby again since we haven't since week 8 and 2] be able to know our baby better by having a name and start planning for his or her arrival! 

Questions and Comments in No Specific Order

[1] Yay for being 17 weeks along with my wonderful baby, and not having any nausea or dizziness in at least a couple weeks! Instead I have had a ton of heartburn and am sleepy all the time. Apparently, I will never again not be sleepy so I am embracing it. We will find out whether we are having a boy or girl in 3 short weeks!

[2] Why do apples make my throat really itchy, and yet apple sauce tastes wonderful and has no negative affect on me??

[3] I made my first pie ever with my friend Christine. We were a good team and everyone at Bekuh's wedding shower loved them. ;)

[4] I was recently recommended the devotional 'Jesus Calling'. It's a must have. It's written from God to you, with a few verses attached. Definitely encouraging.

[5] I am in the process of picking out the bigger baby things. Katie has given me many suggestions, but if there is something one of you can't live without as a mommy, let me know!

[6] God is doing things. Drew and I are watching, praying, seeking, and basking in the fact He knows us intimately and we are privileged enough to serve Him.

[7] School starts tomorrow. I'm taking my last 4 difficult classes before the baby comes. After this semester I only have electives left. phew. Drew starts a master's program at Liberty tomorrow. It will be in discipleship ministries and I'm proud of Him for starting it! Please pray for both of us, as we are going to be super busy the next couple months!

[8] Our friends Tim and Rebecca, who got married this summer, moved here a week ago. We are SO excited to have them back in our lives after a long summer in Indiana (where they are from).

[9] I have had a few quick visits with my sister, brother-in-law, niece and nephew this month. Katie and I have had a ton of chats on the phone, snuggles with baby Owo and playing catch with Audrey have all been welcomed distractions from all of the busyness that August has brought to the Hunsley household.

[10] I have been listening to a lot of my praise and worship songs on my Ipod lately. Some of the lyrics from a specific song has been such a comfort to me. It is a reminder that my God holds my hand, walks me through life, and wants to have an intimate relationship with me.

I want to sit at your feet, drink from the cup in your hand, lean back against you and breathe, feel your heartbeat..

 How can those words not change your outlook on who our Jesus is and how He loves you!

Yeah, He's THAT Awesome!!

God is reliable...

God is our refuge and strength,

A very present help in trouble. 

Therefore we will not fear, (v.1,2a)

Natural disasters are miraculous...

Even though the earth be removed, 

And though the mountains be carried in the midst of the sea:
Though its waters roar and be troubled, 

Though the mountains shake with it's swelling. (v. 2b,3)

BUT, with God for us, NOTHING can stop Him...

There is a river whose streams shall make glad the city of God,

The holy place of the tabernacle of the Most High.

God is in the midst of her, she shall not be move;

God shall help her, just at the break of dawn. (v.4,5)

THE NATIONS RAGED, THE KINGDOMS WERE MOVED; HE UTTERED HIS VOICE....

THE EARTH MELTED. (v.6)

The Lord of hosts is with us;

The God of Jacob is our refuge.(v.7)

Come and see His power...

Come, behold the works of the Lord,

Who has made desolations in the earth.

He makes wars cease to the end of the earth;

He breaks the bow and cuts the spear in two;

He burns the chariot in the fire.(v.8,9)

TRUST that our God is who He says He is...

Be still, and KNOW that I am God; 

I will be exalted among the nations, 

I will be exalted in the earth!(v.10)

The Lord of hosts is with us;

The God of Jacob is our refuge.(v.11)

Psalm 46

Cars Cars Cars

Drew has spent the last couple months looking at cars on different websites. Mainly Craigs list. We found my Escape on there and it's wonderful! He sold his Volvo and bought a Lancer. The Lancer was not all it was cracked up to be and super baseline so Drew wasn't happy with it. I wasn't either frankly, but I wasn't the one driving it. So he asked if he could sell it if he made sure to break even or make a profit. (We had to by new plates, get an inspection, and have the AC looked at so I didn't want that money to be lost.) He ended up selling it for $1000 more than we paid for it. I think over $600 more than we paid/put into it in the short month we had it. I'd say that was a successful sale. :) That was over a week ago.

He was already looking at new cars, but of course didn't want to follow any leads until he knew he could sell the Lancer. So we borrowed his mom's van who is in the Dominican Republic for a few weeks (thanks Phyllis, although I'm not sure you know we borrowed it. ;)) and started searching for a new one. Yesterday Drew drove to PA to get his new (to him) Mazda 6. It's nice. :) and smells good. :) and ended up being $2000 under blue book. I'm a fan of my man's deal finding. He got home around 11:30 last night, but was confident it was definitely worth the trip.

This morning, while he was backing my car out of the driveway, it broke. We think. He shifted it into reverse and  it went into park, but was moving in neutral. Weird. So we sent it off on a tow truck to be looked at on Monday.

I'm saying all of this because...

You know what? God's pretty cool.

We would have been stuck with one car if it had happened anytime in the past week and a half. It didn't, it happened the morning after God blessed us with a great deal on a second car. This just means we are borrowing the van a few more days. :) 

Thanks God, for taking care of the little things. and for giving me a considerate husband who is going to let me drive his new car on Monday while he drives the van with no A.C.  Now we are just praying for a quick, cheap fix.

His ways are higher

You know what I have been learning these past few months? The fact that God knows what we are going through even when we have no idea. I am so comforted by the fact His ways are higher than mine, He thoughts greater than mine. We will never understand fully how great our God truly is, neither will we fully see His reasoning for things.

God is in control of ever intricate detail of our lives. He knows why things happen even when at the time they break our hearts, or worry us...

My friend Mandy and I were talking about her husband wanting to go to the Police Academy. I have several family members/close friends that are going/have gone into the military. The thought of them being in those lines of work can be really scary IF we don't understand the concept of our lives aren't our own. We could die at any moment, only Christ knows when. It isn't our job to 'protect' our loved ones from dangerous jobs because they are more 'risky'. We are in Christ's hands, and NOTHING can harm us if He doesn't want it to. Likewise, nothing can STOP something from happening if He DOES want it to.

The reason I am thinking this way today, is because yesterday a friend of my went through a devastating day. She was pregnant with twins, Ian and Owen, and was 20 weeks along. Yesterday morning her water broke, and as a result she had to deliver the babies. They both went to heaven shortly afterward, and my heart was broken for that family. PLEASE keep the parents in your prayers, because  I cannot imagine the heartache that they, and their two older boys, are going through right now.

That news was heartbreaking for anyone who heard about it, and I had to catch myself so I didn't start worrying about my own little baby. My sister informed me that once your a parent, (even if you haven't met your baby yet ;)) that  the thought of something happening to your child becomes your worst nightmare. I am rejoicing today that I, and the parents above, have a God that we can trust fully with our families. Christ calls us to deny everything in order to follow Him, and I truly believe that includes having open hands with our most prized possessions. Of course we hope He allows us to keep those people in our lives, but we HAVE to be willing to let Him take them for a much greater good. "ALL THINGS WORK TOGETHER ACCORDING TO HIS PURPOSE." ALL THINGS.

That is want I'm choosing to cling to, and I'm praising God today that He has allowed me to know Him in a way that does comfort in hard times.

but Jesus said, “Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 19:14

Hard things are good things...

I was talking with some friends recently about trials. When we pray for something we expect God to answer by giving a yes or a no. What happens when that answer doesn't work. Sure it works for health, jobs, school, etc...

When you pray for patience, or a closeness to the Savior or perhaps contentment. God isn't going to just say "Tada, today you will now be a peaceful and put together woman." (Don't we wish!)

He usually sticks us in situations that help build that character trait. He sends frustrating and unlovable people in our lives so that we learn to love. He sends bills and broken down cars into our lives to learn to trust and be content with what we do have. He sends busyness into our lives so that we will put aside those things for what matters most.

Busyness usually gets me the most. When I have to much on my plate, usually one of the first things to go is my personal time with my Savior. Sure I can still pray in the car, but the time soaking into the word of God, is what gets left behind. Some say it's because it isn't pressing, some may say there is no deadline for it, while others say that by the time they get home from their crazy lives they just need to sleep.

No! What we need is to dig into Christ. What we need is to drop anything that we feel we can't drop (because if we can't let it go, lets be serious, it's an idol) and get. on. our. knees.

Victory Comes While Praising

2 Chronicles 20 discusses Jehoshaphat the King figuring out how to defeat a vast army... He starts by saying "Listen... thus says the Lord:'Do not be afraid nor dismayed because of this great multitude, for the battle is not yours, but God's.  Tomorrow go against them... You will not need to fight in this battle. Position yourselves, stand still and see the salvation of the Lord, who is with you. Do not fear or be dismayed; tomorrow go out against them, for the Lord is with you.'"

So they rose early and went out into the wilderness... Jehoshaphat stood and said,"Hear me, believe in the Lord your God and you shall be established; believe His prophets and you shall prosper." 

Jehoshaphat then divided his people between those who "should sing to the Lord, and who should praise the beauty of the holiness, as they went out before the army the sang "Praise the Lord, for His mercy endures forever!"

While they were singing and praising the Lord, the Lord set ambushes against their enemy, and they were defeated.

So when Judah came to a place overlooking the wilderness, they looked toward the multitude; and there were their dead bodies, fallen on the earth. No one had escaped.

Victory comes while praising.

When we are lost and confused. When we don't know what to do or how to pray about a situation. Start praising our Savior.

"Praising God is a way of trust." We have to set aside all of our fears and troubles of this world and look to God. Only God. That is where the battle was won.

Today I praise God that:
116- I only have 3 weeks of school left
117- I have a husband who likes me. :)
118- My Savior wraps me in His arms and holds me tight, through the best and worst times of my life
119- I no longer have headaches due to my heavy hair, because it's gone!
120- Audrey is my niece, her sweet and hilarious nature make me giddy with happiness
121- Owen is my nephew, his smiles make me want to never let him go.
122- the pollen seems to have diluted a tad since I'm not overly stuffy this week... knock on wood.
123- there is a possibility for starting a new small group at our house with friends.
124- phone calls from Mandy make me rejoice over the wonderful friendships I have, near and far
125- reeses peanut butter eggs are a part of my life... sigh pure deliciousness
126 - that I have to work hard for things that I love. The fact I can fight for what's right and God is right there helping me, makes me grateful.

 

Satan Has No Control

How many times do we as Christians struggle to ask for forgiveness. I have talked to several friends and we all agree that there are sometimes we just don't want to ask God for forgiveness. It has nothing to do with us thinking we don't need it, and everything to do with being ashamed.

Ashamed to go to a perfect God, and admit (silly us, he already knows) that we screwed up. again. I hate that feeling but I have had it several times. That knowing that you need to make things right with God because yet again, you've failed. I feel like I don't deserve His forgiveness. I don't want God to let me off that easy to where, I neglect Him and yet He still longs for me to come back to Him. 

Last Sunday we were singing "Before the Throne of God Above" and a few of the lyrics really touch my heart. Read them slowly.

When Satan tempts me to despair, And tells me of the guilt within, Upward I look, and see him there Who made an end of all my sin. Because a sinless Savior died, My sinful soul is counted free; For God, the Just, is satisfied To look on Him and pardon me

Satan uses guilt. He wants us to stay far from the Savior as long as possible. But He doesn't have control over us. We are free from the bondage of sin. It has no reign over us. So don't let Satan make us think it does!

God has pardoned me. He has died a horrible death because He wants me. He wants me to be with Him. He wants me to come to Him with praise, hurts, and yes, even failures. Once I am in His hands, NOTHING can separate us from His love. Because it is unceasing. 

Is grace enough?

Oh Karen, how I have missed reading your books. Thank you for reaching me an amazing truth about our creator while reading your book. I love how God uses many very separate avenues to bring about a common theme that I need to understand better.

Many times we ask God for miracles. So often we have specific miracles in mind though. We think that God should heal that sick family member, or give that person a promotion, or keep those that are in dangerous situations safe. We may want our child to love God with all that we have and grow up to be  a pastor or missionary or doctor. Thankfully, God has a way clearer picture of how all things work together for good. You see he may choose to let that family member die, or allow someone to lose their job. Do we still trust Him when that is His decision??

Karen pointed out a great passage in 1 Kings about Elijah having a hard time. So God said that he would make himself known to him. So there was fire, but God was not there. There was a gust of wind, but God was not found in the wind either. Then there was a still small voice. That is where God was. We so often look for God to be in the huge accomplishments or amazing things in life, that we overlook the daily whispers of God. We don't recognize that Jesus is in your child learning a memory verse, or someone understanding God a little more during a conversation you have with them. We don't see God in the years of health that we do have, we just feel like He isn't there when things go wrong.

I have been thinking a lot about being grateful for the little things God gives us. He doesn't owe us anything. My friend Rebecca's fiance said something the other day that will probably be with me a long time. He said that when someone argues that God isn't there, say "shhhhhhhhh we don't want God to be fair." Think about that. Do you really want our powerful creator of the universe to be fair and give us what we deserve?? Then maybe we all should start being a little more thankful in the little things that He does....

I have also been studying Galatians. In chapter 2 verse 21, Paul states that " I do not set aside the grace of God..." I admit that I fail to acknowledge the massive amount of grace that my God lavishes on me. often. If He never gave me my desires, He still is worthy of my praise because he is a gracious God. My praise should be without ceasing due to that fact alone. 

Are we still enough to hear His whisper... see His constant hand on our lives?

My God is Here

I have been reading through the book of Psalms... backwards. Don't ask me why because I couldn't tell ya. It isn't every day by any means, but whenever I read a Psalm during my time with God, I leave where I left off, from the end to the beginning. I reached chapter 66 and was amazed. These verses are my life. These are what I cling to, because I KNOW them to be true about how awesome my God is. (The name awesome is even used in this chapter for the name of God, which I think is very accurate to how I feel about Him.)

MY GOD IS HOLY. HE HAS OVERCOME THE WORLD, AND ALL WILL BOW TO HIM ONE DAY.

Through the greatness of Your power your enemies shall submit themselves to you.

HE HOLDS ME IN HIS HANDS. NOTHING CAN SEPARATE ME FROM THAT. HE WILL PROTECT.

Bless our God... [who] does not allow our feet to be moved.

IN THIS WORLD WE WILL HAVE TROUBLES, WHETHER FROM OUR OWN SELFISHNESS OR THROUGH SATAN'S ATTACK. GOD WILL BRING US THROUGH.

We went through fire and through water, But you brought us out to rich fulfillment.

I AM ALIVE SO THAT I CAN MAKE HIM KNOWN TO OTHERS. DECLARE HIS NAME BY MY PERSONAL EXPERIENCES AND WHAT I KNOW TO BE TRUE ABOUT HIM.

Come and hear, all you who fear God, And I will declare what He has done for my soul.

HE HEARS ME. HE CARES FOR ME. HE PICKS ME UP WHEN I FALL, AND LOVES ME THE SAME.... CONSTANTLY AND CONSISTENTLY.

Who has not turned away my prayer, Nor His mercy from me! 

* The word of God is in italics.